What is social anxiety?
Social anxiety is a feeling of fear or worry toward social situations in which the individual is concerned they will be criticized by others. While experiencing some social anxiety is normal, experiencing high amounts can keep us from living a fulfilling life. Social anxiety can do this by…
Giving us a strong desire to avoid or escape social situations (e.g., skipping a party you were invited to or calling in sick on the day you were scheduled to speak at a meeting).
Keeping our attention on ourselves and how we think we’ll be perceived rather than on the present moment (“I acted super awkward just now, they probably think I’m weird”).
Causing us to make disastrous predictions about how things will turn out (“If I go to my work barbeque everyone will wonder why I came. I’ll look so stupid”).
Creating worried images that repeatedly pop into our minds, typically ones where we imagine being embarrassed.
Giving us strict rules about how we “should” or “must” act in social situations (“I can never stumble over my words or people will think I’m incompetent,” “I must always stay quiet or other people will think I’m too talkative”).
Do I Have Social Anxiety Disorder?
People with significant social anxiety may have social anxiety disorder, which is one of the most common (and most treatable) mental health struggles. If you identify with the following symptoms you may have social anxiety disorder.
Intense fear or anxiety towards social situations in which you are exposed to possible scrutiny by others or will be the center of attention.
You fear that you will behave in a way, or will show anxiety, that will be negatively evaluated by others.
The social situations almost always provoke fear or anxiety.
The social situations are actively avoided or are endured with great difficulty.
The fear or anxiety is disproportionate to the actual dangers posed by the social situation, or is recognized by the individual as excessive or unreasonable.
The fear, anxiety, or avoidance is persistent (typically at least 6 months).
How Does Social Anxiety Get Better?
Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is the most effective psychotherapy treatment for social anxiety. By learning how to manage our emotional distress, challenge and change our anxious thoughts, and safely approach (rather than avoid) anxiety-inducing situations, we can reduce or even eliminate our fear of social situations. While having a good CBT therapist (like one from Agape) can be very helpful in overcoming social anxiety, you can also do self-guided CBT.
Imagine a Life Without Social Anxiety
Take a moment and imagine what your life would look like without social anxiety. How would work be different? What about your relationships? Or your social life? Would you go to new, exciting places? Would you spend more time with people? What positives would it bring your friends and family? How would you feel about yourself if you were less anxious?
A life without social anxiety is possible. If you’ve been thinking about getting help, consider scheduling an appointment with Agape or another counselor near you.
